faesphere | Affurgato | Player Business

Affurgato is a classy casual cat cafe! (Technically an any-pet cafe, but usually there are cats.) Due to the small customer base, its hours and open days are limited, but it will open off-schedule on commission for private parties and is available for catering orders, both with advance notice, preferably at least two days prior depending on scale.

All food is fresh-baked on-site and the food not only tastes normal but natural, rather unlike the replicated food one can make at home. It's all very magical. (Literally. It is literally magical.)

The walls are painted warm shades of browns and pinks, pet toys are scattered throughout the main area, and there are synthetic trees and shelving along the walls for climbing and exploring. A variety of music plays quietly from speakers near the kitchen, genres ranging from classic to random pop songs.

Typically there are at least two cats in the shop while it is open, typically four. Other animals may be available depending on request or availability. (It is run by a wizard with transmutation magic, after all.)

If you want to see a specific type of animal, please request it and we'll see what can be done!

OPEN HOURS: Friday-Sunday 12PM-7PM

COST: A small flat fee per hour + the cost of food orders

HOUSE RULES
Breaking any rule (especially #1 and 2) will net you a warning or, upon further (or obviously intentional) infractions, a swift teleport out the door with a BANNED sign slapped to your ass. Kindly behave yourself!

1) Do not feed the animals. They are well-cared for and do not need it!
2) Do not hurt or manhandle the animals. Seriously? Seriously. Come on.
3) Inform the staff of any mess, injury, or animal inconvenience. Help us help you.
4) Don't loiter excessively. This is a business, not a living room! Make space for paying customers.
5) Pay your bill before you leave. The elves can and will break into your house and steal your shit. And the cats tell them everything they see.

MENU
(upon request the chefs MAY try to make non-menu items, or add it to the menu in the future.
They are fickle, though. Ask nicely and tip well.)

Lunch Specials

CATHEAD TOASTED PANINI
-Salmon, spinach, cream cheese.
-Roast beef with wasabi shoyu dressing.
-Turkey and provolone with pesto.
(Sandwiches on bread shaped like cat heads. Can be transmuted into soy approximations of the meat fillings or cheeses for vegans.)

KITTEN QUICHE
A flavourful veggie-and-ham filled cheese pie in the shape of a cat's paw.

WEDGE CUT FRENCH FRIES OR BAKED POTATO CHIPS
A classic finger food! Comes with real ketchup.

TACO 'BOUT IT
A classic taco with all the fixings. Choose soft or hard shell. (Alternatively, try as a wrapped purrito.)

DUMPLINGS
Chunky meat and pepper dumplings, steamed and served with sweetened soy sauce.

FRESH SALAD (MONTHLY)
Lasra (JAN). Baby Spinach Salad - candied pecans, dried cherries, red onions and cheese, honey & and wine vinaigrette
Nalom (FEB). Classic Caesar Salad - bacon, croutons and Parmesan cheese, creamy garlic dressing
Ainir (MAR). Kale Crunch Chop Salad - dried cranberries, blue cheese, red onion, cucumbers, sweet potato bits, creamy tarragon dressing
Lasai (APR). House Salad - mushrooms, peppers, red onions, zucchini, cheese, grilled chicken, balsamic vinaigrette
Ealom (MAY). Farro and Chickpea Salad - farro, arugula, chickpeas, cucumber, red pepper, feta cheese, garlic vinaigrette
Dianir (JUN). Tortellini Chicken - tortellini, grilled chicken, garlic, baby arugula, cheese, zesty lemon dressing
Lasdia (JUL). Spinach Salmon - grilled salmon, baby spinach, tarragon, mint, salted garlic butter dressing
Achtom (AUG). Potato Salad - potatoes, eggs, bacon, red onion, mayonnaise, spices
Ohnir (SEP). Classic Veggie - red onion, peppers, cherry tomatoes, quinoa, leaf lettuce, feta cheese, creamy garlic dressing
Lasohm (OCT). Chicken Bals and Nuts - grilled balsamic chicken, pecans, arugula, raspberries, spicy mustard garlic vinaigrette
Malom (NOV). Black and Blue Steak - grilled steak strips, arugula, red onion, blue cheese, mustard vinaigrette
Ranir (DEC). Winter Salad - baby spinach, kale, sliced grapes, grilled pork slices, cheese, citrus dressing

SOUP (MONTHLY)
Lasra (JAN). Potato Bacon - potatoes, parmesan, chives, garlic, leeks, buttermilk, sour cream, bacon bits
Nalom (FEB). Pheasant Noodle Soup - grilled pheasant (or chicken), carrots, celery, onion, peppercorns, egg pasta noodles
Ainir (MAR). Black Bean Soup - onion, black beans, chili spice, cilantro, lime, garlic
Lasai (APR). Chicken and Quinoa Soup - onion, celery, carrots, broccoli, quinoa, chicken
Ealom (MAY). Chondathan Wedding Soup - parmesan, beef and pork meatballs,onion, egg, chicken broth, chopped endive
Dianir (JUN). Pork Wonton Soup - wontons, grilled pork, minced shrimp, fish sauce, wine
Lasdia (JUL). Rice & Spice - peppers, onion, cayenne, chicken broth, tomatoes, rice, corn, black beans, tortilla topping
Achtom (AUG). Butternut Squash Soup - butternut squash, chicken stock, honey, cream
Ohnir (SEP). Broccoli Cheese Soup - broccoli, onion, garlic, mixed cheese sauce
Lasohm (OCT). Bean Barley - cannellini beans, pearl barley, cheese, escarole, chicken broth, white wine, sliced sausage
Malom (NOV). Chicken Wing Soup - carrot, onion, celery, hot sauce, chicken stock, stripped chicken wings, blue cheese
Ranir (DEC). Harvest Vegetable - carrot, leek, celery, potato, zucchini, tomato, green beans, pasta

Desserts

ASSORTED COOKIES
Fresh baked in a variety of flavours, shaped as fish or various mammals.

FRUIT TARTS
Rotating fruit flavours, a delicate sweet pastry with icing whiskers.

AFFOGATO
The titular treat. Vanilla gelato (or ice cream) topped with a shot of hot espresso.

MOCHA-CHIP MEOWFFINS
Sweet coffee muffins, for when you're pretending to be almost healthy.

NYALASADAS
Malasadas, fried dough balls with various fillings.

DOPENUTS
Donuts of assorted flavours. Soft and fresh-baked.

CAKE (MONTHLY)
Lasra (JAN). Classic Chocolate Torte
Nalom (FEB). Red Velvet Ice Cream Cake
Ainir (MAR). Lemon Meringue Angel Cake
Lasai (APR). Mint Vanilla-Chocolate Chip
Ealom (MAY). Caramel Apple Coffee Cake
Dianir (JUN). Blueberry Cornmeal Cake
Lasdia (JUL). Rainbow Sugar Bomb Spice Cake
Achtom (AUG). Strawberry Shortcake with Cream
Ohnir (SEP). Sea-Salt Caramel
Lasohm (OCT). Pumpkin Torte
Malom (NOV). Buttercream Hazelnut Cheesecake
Ranir (DEC). Spiced Carrot Cake

Courtesy of Ignis Scientia's Recipe Book

TOMATO AND EGG PURR-FRY
Stir fry mix with eggs, vegetables, and diced meat in a sweet tomato-based sauce.

TRIPLE TRUFFLE RISOTTO
Mixed mushroom risotto over fluffy white rice.

THE CATS WILL ABSOLUTELY STEAL THIS
A mixed seafood paella in spicy sauce over rice and vegetables.

CRISPY FISH FRITTERWICH
Battered fish sandwich, flaky and spicy.

TAELPAR HARVEST GALETTE
A thin pastry filled with oranges and sweet cream.

MOOGLE MOUSSE WITH KUPOBERRY SAUCE
What the hell is this...? Oh, it's a strawberry mousse cake. Fun fact: there's sweet potato in this. Feel free to pretend it's healthy.

Drinks

COFFEE (latte, cappuccino, espresso)
Made to order; regular, or flavoured on request. Animal designs drawn into the cream.

TEA
Made to order; regular, or flavoured on request.

HOT CHOCOLATE
Made with fresh melted chocolate and milk. The classic way! No cheap powder here.

FRUIT SODAS
Sweet, fizzy, flavoured on request.

MILKSHAKES
Various fruit flavours, vanilla, chocolate, coffee, caramel.

CHOCOLATE RAIN
Chocolate-y milkshake topped with whipping cream, raindrop-shaped sprinkles of chocolate, and chocolate syrup.

WINE
Red, white, rose.

COCKTAILS/SHOTS
Funky Monkey - rum, banana liquer, coconut milk, banana puree; frozen
Flaming Giraffe - coffee liquer, butterscotch liquer, rum; lit on fire when served
Salty Dog - gin & grapefruit juice with salted rim
Barking Spider - tequila, orange liqueur, sours, orange juice and rum
Blue Frog - vodka, rum, gin, tequila, triple sec, curacao; iced
Jungle Dragon - vodka, rum, dragonfruit juice, mango nectar; iced
Mewmosa Float - champagne, vodka, vanilla; garnished with ice cream scoop, flavoured to choice

ANIMALS

Ditto is a striped male toyger kitten. As Lup's familiar, he is a fae creature bound to her by magic, for those who can sense it. Incredibly cuddly and curious, he will play with endless energy as long as he has a willing partner. Known to occasionally poof in and out of existence.

Kova is an alien cat, with large ears and slightly elongated appearance. While intelligent and loyal to his owner, Honerva, he is also a sensitive animal, inclined to listen to and provide comfort for those who might be in need of it. He can also be quite playful, sometimes preferring to engage patrons with a toy before allowing petting, depending on his familiarity with them.

Harmony is a female split-colour tabby. A little shy, but sweet-tempered and gives warm cuddles. (left by Todoroki, lives permanently at the cafe.)

Rio is a male Scottish fold. Very friendly and playful. Watch those teeth! (left by Todoroki, lives permanently at the cafe.)

Current Workers

Lup (Owner, Chef, and Professional Polymorpher)

Honerva (Server and Animal Handler)

KNOWN ALLERGIES (OR FOOD THAT WILL NOT BE SERVED)
Peanuts (and all known variations)
Avocado